There is something very final about a burial, so depending on the wishes of the deceased, many people prefer to receive their loved one’s ashes. This then brings the question of where to keep them. The deceased may have stated their wishes, perhaps to be scattered in a meaningful area. Some mourners want to hold onto the ashes for comfort and keep them in their home, while others organise ‘the interment of ashes’ to create a permanent place outside the home, where all those who knew the deceased can pay their respects.
Interment of ashes is one type of funeral service where cremation remains are buried, or placed in a permanent location. Usually this means placing the ashes in a columbarium or burial plot. This is particularly comforting for:
This guide will take you through what happens at the interment of ashes, some of the choices you have and some things you might not have known.
After the cremation, the ashes will be collected, stored and given to the family. A separate interment of ashes service can then take place with family and friends gathering at the burial plot. The service can be religious or humanist and can include readings, poems and prayers.
The ashes are usually lowered into the ground inside an urn or poured into the plot through a funnel.
You can choose to mark the plot with a cremation memorial so that mourners have a place to visit. Your can personalise your chosen design and space by incorporating a photograph, beautiful headstone inscriptions or motif that best represents their life.
If the interment of ashes is at a natural burial site, the urn needs to be biodegradable.
The procedure for the interment of the ashes starts with finding a permanent location.
Possible locations include:
The process for private land requires you to have permission from the land owner. If you are holding the interment of ashes in a natural burial ground, you will not be allowed a headstone, but trees can be planted on the area instead. You will also need to use a biodegradable urn.
After you have chosen where to place the ashes you need to make sure that everything is budgeted for and that you have all the required paperwork. You need to be ready to provide a cremation certificate, the Deed of Exclusive Right of Burial (grave deeds) or a notification of interment of ashes form.
Firstly, you need to call the local authority in charge of the plot. If you don’t already have a plot, you can purchase the rights to one. You will receive a discount on the cost of the plot if you or your loved one is local to the area. Rather than buying the plot you are often leasing the plot for a fixed amount of time, rather than owning.
If you have space within a family plot you can choose to bury the ashes there. If lots of people hold the Deed of Exclusive Right of Burial you may need permission from the other owners first, especially if there is limited space.
Churches will have their own procedures and rules about what type of headstones and urns can be used.
Whereas a local authority burial plot will leave you to organise your own interment of ashes ceremony, a church will have a minister who will hold a religious ceremony.
As churchyards are consecrated ground, disturbing other ashes can be an issue that can arise. Churches will also have rules and guidelines about what type of urn you can use.
Choosing whether you want to invite guests to the internment of ashes is completely up to you and how you wish to celebrate your loved one’s life. If the deceased was an outgoing and confident character, you may decide that a larger celebration with lots of family and friends will be the best choice. Whereas if they were a shy and independent kind of person, you may think an intimate ceremony will be more fitting.
The interment of ashes ceremony takes place after the cremation ceremony. The interment of ashes usually lasts around an hour. During a typical ceremony:
You might not think there is much to consider if burying the ashes in your own garden, but by law, cremation ashes are treated the same as a human body.
Many people are not aware of any restrictions. These only apply if you are burying the ashes in an urn or box, not for scattering the ashes. There are a number of things that you may need to consider:
To find out the exact cost of the plot for burying cremated ashes, take a look at what areas we cover in the UK and contact your chosen location.
The average cost is around £600, but prices can be as much as £2,000 or as little as £100 depending on the location.
As well as the burial fee, you might also pay for:
The costs vary greatly depending on which area of the country the burial is taking place in and whether you or the deceased live locally.
There are no specific guidelines on what to wear to an interment of ashes ceremony, however wearing modest attire is considered most appropriate, to show reverence and respect for the deceased and their family. Avoid casual clothes such as shorts, vests, baseball caps and flip-flops to err on the side of caution, and instead opt for something that is in line with cultural norms, and aligns with the wishes of the family of the deceased if applicable.
There are no strict requirements as to what words should be said at an interment of ashes ceremony. People may choose to give a short eulogy and share stories about the life of the deceased. Others may prefer to say a prayer, read an extract from their loved one’s favourite book, or recite a poem.
Reading a poem can be comforting for all those attending when scattering ashes or at an interment of ashes service. A quick search on the internet will bring up a large choice. Some well-loved favourites include:
If interring the ashes of your loved one doesn’t seem like the right option for you, there are alternative ways to say goodbye.
Many people choose to scatter the ashes of their loved ones in a memorable location. This could be a place their loved ones enjoyed spending time, or somewhere that has sentimental memories. In the UK, there’s no explicit laws against the scattering of ashes, although some private or public areas may require you to get permission.
In recent years, the transformation of ashes into diamond jewellery has become popular. These diamonds can be fused with different types of jewellery, such as necklaces and bracelets. Ashes can be split between family members so each can hold their loved one close to them after they are gone.
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