How to ask for time off for a funeral

What is bereavement leave?

Bereavement leave is time off given by your employer following the death of someone close to you (also known as compassionate leave). Bereavement leave can be paid or unpaid and this is at the employer’s discretion.   There is no strict definition of who falls under the category of someone close to you, as they could be a family member, a friend or a work colleague, and their death can be just as traumatic for some people.

How much bereavement leave is an employee entitled to in the UK?

There is no set number of days’ bereavement leave that an employee is entitled to in the UK — it is up to the employer and will be detailed in the employee’s contract. Usually, bereavement leave will be about three to five days.

What is considered immediate family for bereavement leave?

Family bereavement is the most common reason for an employee to be granted bereavement leave. ‘Immediate family’ usually refers to: 

• Your children
• Your spouse or civil partner
• Your parents
• Your siblings

Some employers will also recognise grandparents and grandchildren as close family as well as the parents of your spouse.

However, it is an area which is far from defined, due to the varying nature of human relationships. Some employers will allow you to take bereavement leave if you are grieving the loss of a close friend or extended family.

Can an employer deny time off for a funeral?

It depends on the relation you have to the deceased. You have the right to take time off for the funeral of a dependent, whether that be a spouse, child or parent.  However, an employer will have discretion as to whether they allow time off for the funeral of someone outside your immediate family.  This type of leave falls under compassionate leave, and an employer will usually be reasonable in giving you time off to attend the funeral of a loved one, however it is important to communicate this to them so that they can make necessary adjustments in your absence.

Do you need to show proof when requesting bereavement leave?

Your employer should document the policies and procedures surrounding bereavement leave in the employee handbook, and in some cases they can request a funeral notice or obituary of the person whose funeral you’re attending.  In most cases however, this will not be required as long as you communicate your situation clearly to your employer.

How to ask for bereavement leave:

Tell your employer what has happened as soon as you can

If easier, you can send an email to your line manager or HR department rather than meet them in person to inform them of the bereavement.  Try to ask for time off as soon as you can as this will allow you the space to grieve, plan funeral arrangements or the interment of ashes. It also allows your employer to manage the workflow with minimal disruption. 

If your loved one has been ill for some time, you may have confided in your employer and had time off to care for a family member, so your employer may have already considered bereavement leave as a request that might follow. If the loss of a loved one is sudden, then a brief conversation with your employer to let them know before you submit the bereavement leave request would be expected.

Read through your bereavement leave policy

Your employees’ handbook will usually detail the company bereavement leave policy — how long the leave lasts and whether or not it is paid. Sometimes whether or not you work full-time or part-time might be a factor. 

If you do not have a company handbook, request a meeting with your manager or HR personnel to ask what the policies are and ask for a signed copy of them so that you have something to refer to and can avoid any confusion.

Decide how much time off you need

When requesting time off and deciding how many days’ leave to ask for, make sure that you account for your mental health as well as financial and organisational factors. You may want to add holiday allowance on to your bereavement leave if you need more time. 

Put your request for bereavement leave in writing

After you have had a meeting with your HR department or line manager, put your request for bereavement leave in writing (usually an email is acceptable).

Ask HR or your manager to communicate with colleagues

It is likely that you will be feeling emotionally vulnerable so ask your HR department or your line manager to notify your colleagues so that you don’t have to answer the same questions numerous times as this could be overwhelming.