Losing a baby to stillbirth is an unimaginable and devastating experience. Even though they may never have had the chance to live, you are still losing a child that you were ready to welcome into the world. Dealing with the grief is incredibly difficult, but taking the time to decide on how you wish to memorialise your baby can be an important part of the healing process.
Finding the right way to commemorate your child is deeply personal. There are a lot of different ways that you can remember your baby after saying goodbye and the choice of memorial will depend on each family. Memorial headstones are common as they are a thoughtful and tangible reminder of your baby’s life and have the potential for complete personalisation. There is no right way to design a memorial headstone – whatever is best for you is the right decision.
The law requires babies that are delivered stillborn after 24 weeks or that only lived for a short time to be cremated or buried, but you can still choose a memorial or headstone to memorialise a baby lost to a miscarriage earlier than this.
At Memorials of Distinction, we have a range of headstones for stillborn babies in a range of unique styles that are appropriate for commemorating the loss of such a young life. These headstones are specially designed for babies or young children and come in all shapes and sizes, from colourful teddy bears to stone cribs. A gravestone featuring a sleeping child resting on a crescent moon would be particularly fitting tribute to a baby born sleeping.
You may decide to choose a memorial headstone in a more traditional style. These provide a blank canvas that you can add etchings, photo plaques and inscriptions to and can be made in a variety of materials and finishes for a completely bespoke memorial. Whatever style of headstone you choose, you can add a sandblasted or etched design or image that represents your baby’s life for further personalisation. Suitable options could include a teddy bear or a butterfly, but you may have a unique memory from your pregnancy that you wish to share on the headstone. Including an image can be a good way to convey something that is difficult to put into words.
Another common style of grave is a kerbed memorial. These cover the full grave and can be filled with colourful chippings or bright flowers, making them another good option for commemorating a young life.
Once you’ve settled on a design for the headstone, it’s time to consider the inscription that will appear on the memorial. Choosing the right wording for your child’s headstone can be a difficult process. Remember, there is no right format – you may want a few short words or you may prefer a lengthier inscription – it is entirely up to personal preference. If you have decided on a name for your baby, you can include this in the inscription. Many parents also include the date the stillbirth occurred, either as a freestanding date or as part of a sentence, such as “born and died on” or “born into eternal life on”.
You may want to add a brief inscription quote under these details or as an opening line. Here are some ideas you could choose for your stillborn baby’s memorial.
You may want to immortalise your child’s memory with a short piece of poetry. This could be a poem that is meaningful to you or an extract from a poem that you plan to read at the funeral or memorial service. You may even wish to write your own poem to find the perfect words to describe your baby. Here are some examples to inspire and guide you:
Take your time when choosing a headstone. Please do not hesitate to contact us for any advice or information to assist you through this difficult process.
Our standard terms for payment are as follows:
20% Deposit when memorial ordered as above.
75% of balance plus burial ground fee payable when permit received from cemetery or church authority. Obtaining permit takes on average 2-3 weeks from first installment.
Final balance payable on completion (ie. when memorial is in place, approximately 12 weeks after receipt of second installment).
A pale blue or pink paint is often used for children’s memorials and works very well. We can accommodate most colour requests for lettering and sandblasted designs. Our experienced staff can advise on the longevity and suitability of your chosen colour when we put together your quotation.
Yes, we are able to reduce the size of most memorials in our collection. If this is not possible due to a particularly intricate memorial style, we would be able to suggest something similar to achieve the effect you are after.
It’s the little things that matter. Every member of staff that I had the pleasure to speak to far exceeded my expectations. Nothing was too much trouble, and the feeling of never being rushed, added to the overall good experience. We chose a pearl blue granite stone, which looks even better in reality. The finished result, including the cropping of photo to remove a hand and arm proved to be an excellent final touch, something we didn’t expect at all. So to say we are pleased with the overall service would be an understatement. MOD and the extended team provided an excellent service, and would highly recommend them.
London Road Cemetery, St. Albans, Herts.
P. Alexander Google Review: 08/05/2021
Such a good service from start to finish. Clear and courteous instruction on what information was needed from me and kept me informed throughout. Finished memorial stone is perfect and installed without a hitch. Thank you.
St Paulinus Church, Dartford, Kent.
Claire D. Google Review: 16/12/2020
I could not be more grateful for the team at Memorials of Distinction for all they have done for my family and I. Despite having to work through such a horrible time, they still managed to make a difficult process easier. I am particularly pleasure with the response times and our agents genuine kindness and patience when responding to my many emails! The headstone is absolutely beautiful and collectively I truly believe we have done Mum proud. So I thank you again Memorials of Distinction for providing such a beautiful memorial.
Aisha R. Google Review: 25/08/2020
Factory & Showroom (Head Office)
The Memorial Works
Southfields Road Dunstable LU6 3EP